This question is one that I get asked over and over.  How can I trust again.

I know it’s really hard to trust again if you’ve been hurt, or had your heart broken, or have been lied to.  There is a really good reason for that!  We are wired for self preservation!

We naturally want to protect ourselves from pain and painful situations.  This is why we often avoid conversations that are uncomfortable.

If you have been hurt and you are finding it hard to trust again, be gentle with yourself.  And realize that before you begin to open up and trust another person you first have to trust yourself.

Spending time with yourself, preferably quiet time (this means time alone, no music, no reading, cell phone turned off) is one of the best ways to do this.  Focus on your feelings.  Get in touch with your inner world.  Start a journal. Learn how to meditate.

Once you begin to trust yourself you’ll find it easier to trust others.  And hey, if you are feeling mistrustful of someone there might be a good reason for it!  Not everyone is trustworthy!  Learn to listen to your body and pay attention to your feelings.  If you can remain curious and open and observe your feelings without judgment you’ll often be able to see more clearly why you feel the way you do.  Be honest with yourself.

Trust is essential to an intimate relationship.  Allow yourself to build trust over time.  Don’t rush.  And remember, trusting yourself is the key.

Love & Magic,

Cindie